The Lone Pylon

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

A Wrench in the Google Machine

So the powers that be in the bowels of the Google empire do not seem to think I am the administrator of Snotbubblefootball.com.  (If it is not me, I'd like to know who it is).

As a direct result, they do not want my money to re-register my domain name for another year.

Which means, Google is out a few bucks and Snot Bubble Football will have to go on hiatus for a while until I can get this crap figured out.

Call it a first world problem, right?

Good luck to all in your fantasy football playoffs.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

History in the Making Week 12

Just when you think you start figuring out the landscape of the NFL, along comes reality and kicks you in the teeth.

Let's see... in review, the Buccaneers beat the Lions in Detroit.  The Cardinals pummel the Colts.  The hapless Jaguars beat the Texans (a team I thought would be a contender for the AFC crown this season).  The Rams destroy the Bears.  The Peyton Manning led Broncos give up a 24 point lead.... really?

Nothing can be taken for granted and nothing is what it seems in the NFL world this time of year.  Just expect the unexpected and you'll be just fine.

Yes, it was a crazy week.  And it's only going to get crazier.

WEEK 12



Saints TE Jimmy Graham has six games this season with at least 100 yards receiving.  That is tied for most in a season by a tight end in NFL history (Tony Gonzalez has done it twice).

Saints QB Drew Brees moved into fifth place in all-time passing yards, surpassing Hall of Famer Warren Moon.   He needs just 34 more yards to become just the fifth player in NFL history to pass for  50,000 yards... and he's only 33 years old.

The Vikings and Packers played to a disappointing tie.  The only other tie between these two teams was on November 26, 1978.

Playing to a tie just doesn't feel right.  That's probably the only thing Packers and Vikings fans can agree on in this intense rivalry.

49ers LB Aldon Smith has 40 quarterback sacks in 38 career games.  That's almost Reggie White-esque.  Impressive.

Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger is 16-1 against the Browns, which is tied for best record by any quarterback against a single opponent (Roger Staubach vs. Giants).

The Chiefs allowed 41 points against the Chargers at Arrowhead Stadium.  Prior to Sunday, the Chiefs defense had given up a total of 63 points at home this season.

Bears RB Matt Forte passed Neal Anderson for the second most rushing yards in Bears franchise history.  He is now a mere 10,550 yards behind franchise leader Walter Payton.

There was a time not that long ago when the NFC West was the weakest division in the league.  Now, it might be the best.  Keep an eye on the Rams, folks.  Jeff Fisher is working his magic again.

Rams WR Tavon Austin is the only player with three touchdowns of greater than 65 yards this season.

...have I ever mentioned that Tavon Austin is really f*#king fast?

Redskins QB Robert Griffin III has fumbled the ball 23 times in 25 games.
Pretty much sums up RGIII's (and the Redskins') season, doesn't it?

The Carolina Panthers defeated the Miami Dolphins for the first time in franchise history.

The Houston Texans are inexplicably horrible.  Then they cut S Ed Reed, their biggest free agent acquisition during the offseason, for speaking the truth.  This franchise is suddenly on an out-of-control, downward spiral.  I did not see this coming.
With one of the best defenders in the league (JJ Watt), one of the best running backs in the league (Arian Foster) and one of the best receivers in the league (Andre Johnson), I thought this was the year the Texans were going to make their mark.  

The Titans had a 300-yard passer and two 100-yard receivers in a game for the first time since December 19, 2004.

Cardinals WR Larry Fitzgerald is the youngest player to reach 11,000 yards receiving.

...and Fitzgerald now has 14 games with at least two touchdowns, which is tied for most in Cardinals franchise history (Ollie Matson).

Broncos WR Demaryius Thomas is the first player in Broncos franchise history to record back-to-back seasons with 10 touchdown receptions.




Life at the Top Week 12...

PASSING: Philip Rivers, SD (492)

RUSHING: Knowshon Moreno, DEN (224)

RECEIVING: Josh Gordon, CLE (237)





Tuesday, November 19, 2013

History in the Making Week 11

The intensity is starting to amp up in the NFL and in fantasy football.  It is palpable.  Week 11 is in the books and the vice is beginning to tighten.  The division races are coming down to the wire.  There are big games coming in the next few weeks.  It is crunch time.

It was another interesting week with more milestones reached and records set.  Let's take a look.

WEEK 11


The Bengals scored 31 points in the second quarter, which is a franchise record for most points scored in any quarter.

Patriots QB Tom Brady made his 185th start with Bill Belichick as head coach, which is the most starts by a quarterback under one head coach in NFL history.

Broncos TE Julius Thomas has 10 touchdown receptions, which is the most for a Broncos tight end since Shannon Sharpe (1998).

Lions WR Calvin Johnson had six receptions for 179 yards and two touchdowns in the first half... and absolutely nothing the second half.  Goose eggs, all around.  Amazing.

Falcons TE Tony Gonzalez now has 16 seasons with at least 50 receptions.  Only Jerry Rice has more (17 seasons).

The Raiders (yes, the Raiders!) have scored a touchdown on five opening drives this season, tied with the Broncos for most in the league.

In the same play, Lions QB Matt Stafford became the leading passer in Lions franchise history (16,005 yds), and completed his 100th career touchdown pass.  I hope he kept that ball.

Raiders QB Matt McGloin is just the second undrafted free agent since 1967 to throw three touchdowns, no interceptions and win his first NFL start (the Browns Todd Philcox also did it 1992).

Saints WR Marquis Colston passed Eric Martin as the all-time leading receiver in Saints franchise history.

The Jaguars are -189 in net points.  Meaning, they have given up 189 more points than they have scored.  That's really bad.

Actual ad from a Jacksonville newspaper this weekend.

Packers K Mason Crosby's 57 yard field goal against the Giants was the second-longest in Packers' history.  It was also the longest field goal ever allowed by the New York Giants.

Redskins LB London "Iron Man" Fletcher is just the fourth player in league history to play in at least 250 consecutive games (joining Jeff Feagles, Brett Favre and Jim Marshall).

Jaguars DE Jason Babin ripped a handful of dreadlocks from Cardinals RB Andre Ellington's head.  (Sorry, but I honestly laughed out loud!)

Legal:
I wish Babin played for the Redskins.  Yeah, that's politically incorrect and totally funny.


Illegal:
Can't hit 'em low, can't hit 'em high.


The Broncos and Chiefs are both 9-1.  This is the first time since 1948 that two teams in the same division start 9-1 or better.

The Eagles won their first home game in 413 days.

Broncos QB Peyton Manning has thrown for a touchdown in 33 straight games.  He also set a single season record for touchdown passes for a player aged 37 years or older.

Oh, and Manning has the most passing yards in league history through 10 games.

Amazing, but true:   Buccaneers RB Bobby Rainey is the first player in franchise history to rush for two or more touchdowns and have a touchdown reception in the same game.  Rainey was an undrafted free agent in 2012, cut by both the Ravens and Browns.

Rainey is a Western Kentucky alumni; one of 23 Hilltoppers to ever play in the NFL.




Life at the Top Week 11...

PASSING: Carson Palmer (419)

RUSHING: Bobby Rainey (163)

RECEIVING: Michael Floyd (193)




Life at the Bottom 2013 Season...


TIMES SACKED: Miami Dolphins: 41
NFL Record: 72 [Raiders, 2006]

MOST OFFENSIVE TURNOVERS: New York Giants: 29
NFL Record: 55 [Falcons, 1974]

FEWEST FORCED TURNOVERS:  San Diego Chargers/New York Jets: 7
NFL Record: 12 [Redskins, 2006]

Monday, November 18, 2013

Pretty Much Sums It Up...

To finish up my rant about protecting quarterbacks, a picture is worth a thousand words:

These plays happened during the same game with the same officiating crew.  The difference between the two?  The game was played in New Orleans.  

Saturday, November 16, 2013

11 Ways to Protect the Quarterback

This week, the NFL announced that even more rule modifications will be considered in an effort to protect the quarterback.  If you follow Snot Bubble Football on Facebook (and if you don't, please do!), you know that I blew coffee out of my nose (good, strong Columbian coffee at that) when I heard this preposterous news.

Don't misunderstand me, I am all for making football a safer sport, but at some point one has to say that football is a contact sport (at least for now) and by definition, it is a high risk endeavor.

However, this got me to thinking: what new rules can the NFL invent in order to protect the prized position of the league?  After all, as of right now, you can't hit the QB high.  You can't hit them low.  You can't so much as lay a finger on their helmet/upper body - intentionally or unintentionally - and it is 15 yards and a first down.

What more is left?

So with this mindset, I decided to think of more ways to protect the quarterback.  And I propose the following modifications to the NFL Rules Committee:

1. Use the same rules for quarterbacks that currently apply to punters and kickers.  If the QB is in the pocket, you can't touch 'em.  Ever.

2. Each QB wears a blaze orange jacket, like that of a deer hunter, and flags anchored by velcro on each hip.  Defenders must pull a flag off the quarterback for the player to be considered down.  If the quarterback is touched in any other way, it is a penalty.

3.  Defenders must count to "five-Mississippi" before rushing.

4.  Defenders must tell the offensive line which defender(s) is/are blitzing on each play.  Or...

5.  ...before each play, the offense must tell the defense if it will be a pass or run.  If it is passing play, defensive linemen are replaced by defensive backs, and offensive linemen are replaced by more receivers.  No pass rush is allowed.

6.  Simply eliminate the forward pass from the game.

7.  Pass rushers must be wheelchair-bound or double amputees.

8.  Quarterback options, sneaks, bootlegs (and any other play(s) in which the quarterback has the potential of being violated) are banned from the game.

9.  Eliminate the quarterback position from the game.

10. Anyone weighing over 200 pounds is banned from football.

11.  Make football, like cock fighting and marijuana, illegal in the United States.